Bethany'Ugly Duckling' Movies are Evil and Must Be Stopped
July 6th 2008 01:36
Okay, I was watching TV tonight when a trailer for Anna Faris's new movie 'The House Bunny' came on. I sighed, and thought back to a movie I once loved: 'She's All That'.
I was fifteen and a much younger, less mature, and far more troubled young Martian than I am today. I loved that movie, I thought it was marvelous. I had decent movie taste when I was a kid, but this was one movie that I grew out of. For very good reason.
'She's All That' goes like this: 'the Popular Guy' (played by Freddie Prinze Jr.) dumped by his girlfriend makes a bet that he can pick any girl out, no matter what. Enter Laney (Rachel Leigh Cook) who's an unpopular art student. He romances her, gets his little sister to give her a makeover, and after a few trials a tribulations he sees her for how she really is and everybody's happy. (I actually do not recall whether or not she becomes Prom Queen, and I really don't care.)
And, although I have only seen one trailer for 'The House Bunny', I'm willing to bet I can set out the plot for you based off of that. See if I ain't wrong. Anna Faris plays a Playboy Bunnie who's gotten a little long in the tooth and was therefore kicked out of the mansion. Now homeless and jobless, she becomes 'House Mother' to an unpopular sorority (geek girls, from what I can tell). After befriending the girls, she gives them all makeovers, finds love herself (when she geeks up a little) and after a few trials and tribulations everybody is seen for who they really are and everybody lives happily ever after.
Gag me. Here's the flaw, the part of these movies that bug me. Bug the hell out of me. Nobody, not even God, can see how pretty these girls are until they have a makeover. This includes replacing glasses with contacts, plucking eyebrows, teaching girls how to paint-roller on makeup, and brand-new, fashionable wardrobes. So, here's the lesson we're teaching our fifteen-and-unders: nobody will ever really see you for who you are unless you lose weight, wear contacts, put some damn makeup on, and wear the newest and hottest fashions.
That's not about being accepted for who you are. That's about pretending to be someone else until you attract the attention of someone who obviously is so shallow they can't see past their nose, and then springing who you really are on them. Sure, it'll get you laid, but unless this is your actual goal, back off a little.
These movies wouldn't bother me if the makeovers were a bit more subtle, and less like making wholly different people out of the subject. But the lesson is "Conform! Conform!" and it makes my teeth buzz.
Here's a suggestion, throw away those movies, and rent '10 Things I Hate About You'. It's a much better message (there are still things that make the little feminist on my shoulder flinch, but she doesn't jump up and down and scream with rage), it's funnier, and it has the dearly departed Heath Ledger. Plus, it draws it's roots from Shakespeare, and does it well.
I was fifteen and a much younger, less mature, and far more troubled young Martian than I am today. I loved that movie, I thought it was marvelous. I had decent movie taste when I was a kid, but this was one movie that I grew out of. For very good reason.
'She's All That' goes like this: 'the Popular Guy' (played by Freddie Prinze Jr.) dumped by his girlfriend makes a bet that he can pick any girl out, no matter what. Enter Laney (Rachel Leigh Cook) who's an unpopular art student. He romances her, gets his little sister to give her a makeover, and after a few trials a tribulations he sees her for how she really is and everybody's happy. (I actually do not recall whether or not she becomes Prom Queen, and I really don't care.)
And, although I have only seen one trailer for 'The House Bunny', I'm willing to bet I can set out the plot for you based off of that. See if I ain't wrong. Anna Faris plays a Playboy Bunnie who's gotten a little long in the tooth and was therefore kicked out of the mansion. Now homeless and jobless, she becomes 'House Mother' to an unpopular sorority (geek girls, from what I can tell). After befriending the girls, she gives them all makeovers, finds love herself (when she geeks up a little) and after a few trials and tribulations everybody is seen for who they really are and everybody lives happily ever after.
Gag me. Here's the flaw, the part of these movies that bug me. Bug the hell out of me. Nobody, not even God, can see how pretty these girls are until they have a makeover. This includes replacing glasses with contacts, plucking eyebrows, teaching girls how to paint-roller on makeup, and brand-new, fashionable wardrobes. So, here's the lesson we're teaching our fifteen-and-unders: nobody will ever really see you for who you are unless you lose weight, wear contacts, put some damn makeup on, and wear the newest and hottest fashions.
That's not about being accepted for who you are. That's about pretending to be someone else until you attract the attention of someone who obviously is so shallow they can't see past their nose, and then springing who you really are on them. Sure, it'll get you laid, but unless this is your actual goal, back off a little.
These movies wouldn't bother me if the makeovers were a bit more subtle, and less like making wholly different people out of the subject. But the lesson is "Conform! Conform!" and it makes my teeth buzz.
Here's a suggestion, throw away those movies, and rent '10 Things I Hate About You'. It's a much better message (there are still things that make the little feminist on my shoulder flinch, but she doesn't jump up and down and scream with rage), it's funnier, and it has the dearly departed Heath Ledger. Plus, it draws it's roots from Shakespeare, and does it well.
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Comment by Cibbuano
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Comment by Bethany
Martian Movies
Sometimes I wonder if Marx had it right, ya know?
It really sucks when teenage girls get this message- it's why anorexia is so prevalent among teenage girls. Because with that message is 'if you're not doing well it's ALL YOUR FAULT'. Can't be that human beings are all different shapes and sizes with different minds behind them. *sigh*